|Posted: 19 May 2016 12:42 PM PDT |
Third Anniversary of Fallen Officer Daryl Raetz
Post Published 8/10/13
I have been putting this particular blog off because…
In honor of Officer Daryl Raetz #8899. E.O.W. May 19, 2013 ….it evokes so much emotion that I sit here begrudgingly typing. It is so hard to be the strong one in circumstances where tragedy hits and yet I know I my must. I feel like I have two worlds of life that seem so drastically different. The first world is so volatile and anything can happen in it, this is my law enforcement world.
The second one is my running world. Yes, you can have disappointments in running but seriously, it is my happy world. There really is no comparison. Which is why I believe they are so different from each other. I am no longer an officer but I am married to one. I am extremely proud of my husband. I truly know what it means to be an officer and the risk involved. It is because of this risk that both my husband and I decided that one of us should step away from this world and be with our children.
I left L.E. in 2010 but I never left the brother and sisterhood that encompasses it as a family. When I hear of an officer getting hurt or worse, my previous experiences from work pop back to the forefront of my memory. This time of year is especially difficult as tragedy hit in 2007 several times and two of the officers lost that year were my friends. Since these sad times, I think of the risk on a daily basis. I try not to dwell on it otherwise I would never let my husband go to work. I have to have faith that he will be protected and that he will do everything in his power to make it home every night he works. After having my third child, I started to run again for a nice mind clearing experience.
I got back into shape and then started to get the racing bug. I am pretty sure I have mentioned before that you can’t ever take the runner out of someone. Even if I was slower this time around, I really enjoyed my training and bonding with my fellow running friends. Plus, I started to move up to longer race distances which really was like starting all over again. Nothing to compare race results, which was helpful to not get down on myself for not being as fast as I used to be. This year I was pretty shook up with what happened in Boston. This was my happy-all-the-time world and it was not happy that day. It was dark and reminiscent of my L.E. world. I had some really good friends competing in the Boston Marathon. Luckily nothing happened to them but that wasn’t the case for others. To think of all those who got hurt or died, most of them spectators. It’s just awful. It makes me think of my husband and kids and the times they have been waiting for me at the finish line. I don’t want to think about that thought anymore. I train a lot with other runners now. It has been wonderful having training partners.
They are not just running partners they are my friends. We have our chit-chat runs that can come across a topic of politics, sports, to even poop….no, it isn’t just me talking about it! Even though I cherish running with others, sometimes it is extremely mind soothing to run on my own. To hear the steps that I take on the surface I am running on, this rhythmic sound gets me thinking about everything. Usually I end up thinking about my girls or what I need to get done for the day/week and so on.
It was on one of these runs where I was thinking about the awful news of the loss of another Police Officer, Daryl Raetz. I couldn’t stop thinking about it. What was most disturbing was the knowledge that he had a daughter roughly around the same age as my daughters.
I saw images of a large mass of wonderful police officers lining the school of Daryl’s daughter’s school because he couldn’t be there. It made me so sad. She was graduating from kindergarten and her daddy would never be there to see her. That same week my twins were graduating from pre-school and I just couldn’t imagine if my husband were not there. This prompted me to want to help his family.
I want his wife and daughter to know that he will never be forgotten. I want them to know we are a community that mourns with them for the loss of a hero and that we are here for them. This summer I ran four races in honor of Officer Raetz. It wasn’t about winning or running fast but recognizing a fallen officer.
When it was hot out and I was tired, I kept in mind that I am the lucky one who gets to run and race my heart out for a true hero. To those who supported my fundraiser, thank you. I had some wonderful comments and feedback regarding it. I know there are so many causes to support and I appreciate your contribution to mine. I will never forget this summer. It has been inspirational to me and perhaps given me a direction I want to take my running world and merge with my L.E. world. Ultimately, they are intertwined anyways, but I want to continue to make every effort possible to be supportive in both. Thank you.